I'm out of words. You just know Coach Rick Jones would so have held a bonfire to burn those charcoal uniforms and they'd never see the light of day again. He'd a ripped it off and flung it out on the field and stomped on it and then stomped off to the locker room. Remember the all blue baseball uniforms?
Anyways, our performance made me so sad that I couldn't even watch other college games the rest of the weekend. And with the election being all kinda ways, I'm like can we fast forward to Baseball Season please?
The bright spot? Ade Aruna. I was super impressed.
I would like to mention that Coach Hullabaloo fancies himself to be an Honorary Adjunct Special Teams specialist and he is a firm believer in the fake punts. Most teams don't give us credit for being fierce and so when we punt everyone runs, leaving us with at least 20 yards of green in front of the punter. Ample room to make a 4th and 2 or a 4th and 3. But we've taken advantage of that like exactly three times in the past 10 years (remember Jonathan Ginsburgh's fake punt at Rutgers? It was so Epic! Dare. to. dream.)
I'm fixing to go invite myself to Special Teams preparations and start providing my own ad lib instructions. Or at least to bring a plate of cookies. (Just kidding Coach if you are reading this! I will bring a plate of cookies tho!)
What's more, bye weeks are just wretched for us! And so our streak of losing after Bye weeks continues. Why, why, why?! I'm fixing to start a Change.org petition that we only have byes the first week and the last week of the season.
My final complaint (for today anyways) which I'd like to lodge, is about our game announcing! I honestly didn't realize it until someone else in our krewe pointed it out. OMG, can we have something to say over the PA when we make a first down? Whoever currently has this task has absolutely zero to say to rile up our fans, it's like they're up there watching The Voice reruns or something and then they turn their attention our game "Oh yeah, Zeddy just ran 33 yards." Ho hum, everyone carry on.
I think they should just mic up Graff for the stadium as well as for the radio. Everybody in favor of that idea say "Aye!"
The pink meanie greenie koozies that were given away were so super cute too. So there's that plus also, if you made the game.
I am so stealing this idea. They said they got the tissue flowers from the dollar store, so guess where I'm bee-ling to?
Ok, so in case you are wondering - we are so not going to Tulsa. Coach Hullabaloo refuses because of his disdain for Tulsans and all things Tulsa. And since we've been to Tulane games in Tulsa three times, that's plenty enough Tulsa for one lifetime thank you. We'll be watching from the confines of Chateau Hullabaloo or a watch party if a watering hole hosts one.
One last nugget: I've been lobbying behind the scenes for a cleansing of Yulman like how Benson did at the Superdome with the nuns and the priestess. I think the Nimbys put a hex and we need to scrub it away. The powers that be think I'm crazy (obviously), but I am serious. Even maybe like a long distance Reiki session, or hang a dream catcher with a dreidel somewhere in there. What do you say?
Well, my chamudis, hang tight til Homecoming!