Confusion With the Cowboys

!BREAKING!

Everything is all a buzz over at thewavereport.com today. Major Drama.

Phone calls are a flying back and forth between June Jones, Bob Toledo and Matt Viator at this exact moment I suspect.

Apparently, everybody wants to play the Tulane Greenwave September 26, 2009.

We Are In Demand. Folks are upset. (Who could have imagined?)

As noted below, Tulane scheduled itself to be in Dallas September 26th and at home September 19th with the McNeese Cowboys. But oh no, says Mr. Viator, our contract states we are to be in New Orleans September 26th for a football game at the Dome.

Mr. Viator even claims that 5,000 to 10,000 (!) McNeese fans have hotel reservations.

I personally witnessed 6 McNeese fans at the baseball game last week, so I will be much impressed to welcome the throngs of thousands more.

I hope this all gets sorted out amicably. I want to personally see what a crowd of 5,000 to 10,000 absolutely silent fans look like. You know, since their was nary a peep out of the 6 that came to Turchin.

Are their football cheers in sign? Do their cheerleaders moonlight as mimes? I want to get to the bottom of this. These are things I want to know.

Update: McNeese will pour into New Orleans September 26th as they had planned. No panicked calls to hotels regarding lost reservations. We will play SMU on November 28. The day after Thanksgiving. Boo Hiss.

Schedule is Out

Attention!

The Tulane football schedule has been announced. Six Home Games. Start your engines, the tailgating preparation clock begins.....

Friday, September 4th we play Aslut at home. The very same weekend as Southern Decadence. Now THAT should be interesting mix and mingling in the french quarter for the aslutians. I don't think we shall point that detail out to them. Let them find that out for themselves.

Friday night game though. Plus, despite my faint, fond memories of dinner at the Polo Grill in Utica Square last year and the double whammy of Mr. Hullabaloo securing THE mega suite at the hotel due to his VIP mileage status, this kick off highlights that I am already less than pleased with this schedule.

(mental note: will personally write to the CUSA commissioner and IMPLORE that Tulsa, Houston and Marshall be forced to undergo class and etiquette indoctrination).

Ladies: the idiot Azerbaijaini from Bravo's "Millionaire Matchmaker," the one who proposed on the first date after a helicopter ride over Vegas to view his so called real estate projects and who turned out to be a complete farce and totally broke? He is a Tulsa alumni. He also claimed to have pledged Sigma Chi.

ESPN is supposed to televise the game. So I will just need to forge ahead and find something absolutely stunning for the cameras.

Saturday, September 12th is BYU at home. Thanks Alabama. We are SO looking forward to tailgating with the mormons. Yes, that seems like an even trade. Sorry we embarrassed you last year. Now you've saddled us with a lame home game. This is not looking good.

Saturday, September 19th is McNeese at home. We are nearing the end of the inferno, we will be emerging from pergatory after this game in the schedule.

You will need to excuse Mrs. Hullabaloo for her patronizing-ness on this schedule situation.

See we played McNeese in baseball this week. Yawn. The game was essentially over in the 4th inning. Because it started to look tacky to keep doing the Hullabaloo after 15 runs, Mrs. Hullabaloo started cheering for the McNeese hitters. Having been on the receiving end of an ass-whipping after ass-whipping for 20 years, I can feel their pain. Gotta liven it up a little and show some encouragement. The McNeese fans might were totally short changing their players by being all droopy. Drive all this way and you don't say a peep for 3.5 hours? You gotta show some love to your kids!

Going into the game McNeese was 8-3 and leading the Southland Conference, while we were 9-5 and scared to death of entering our conference schedule. As we walked out of the park, we watched their coach giving them a serious tongue lashing. Poor guys.

Anyways, I am still unsure about scheduling a football series with McNeese. With their "we shall have NO fun crowds" and all.

We loose a couple of recruits a year at the last minute to McNeese. We lost a big one (3 stars by Rivals) last year, something about his girlfriend and wanting to stay at home (please? Lake Charles over New Orleans? because of some girl?). I just cannot imagine sitting in silent stands game after game. Coach Toledo hired away Jason Rollins from McNeese to coach Defensive Backs for the greenwave. Anyways, here's to hoping that the football crowds travel well. Maybe Mrs. Hullabaloo will whip up a batch of skipngoneekids to share with the visitors and liven up their mood some.

September 26th we go Boulevarding at SMU in Dallas! Major Exclamation Point! Now We Are Talking! Is this not the most adorable tailgating couple EVER? A red carpet moment of Mr. and Mrs. Hullabaloo at SMU in 2007.

I need to start shopping for the most adorable tailgating outfit. Like right now. An appearance at SMU is serious stuff.

Can I tell you how jealous Mrs. Hullabaloo is with SMU and their Boulevarding and their stadium. Ford Stadium is jaw-dropping with that sea of suites and every seat a chairback. Now I have seen my share of college football stadiums throughout our great nation and other than our Dome, nobody even comes close to touching SMU's stadium. Although I don't think that they serve adult beverages in Ford Stadium. It's like they pretend to not be sinners. Well us out and proud sinners would like a drink with our football, thank you.

SMU's tailgating is totally on par with The Grove at Ole Miss. Except better because it's in Highland Park in Dallas. Sorry, Oxford. No competition with the Big D.

October 3rd we begrudingly must go to West Point and that dump Michie stadium. Just hook me up to an IV of bloody mary right now.

Mr. Hullabaloo will need to make some serious hotel and restaurant reservations in Manhattan that weekend because I am seriously pumped to commence some serious ass-whipping against those black knights. Starting by sprouting horns at Zara's and Century 21. I will need to take my frustrations out on my credit card. A) they are a bunch of cheaters and they did NOT make the first down or the touchdown and WE WERE ROBBED. B) last year was entirely our fault, but regardless. Mr. Hullabaloo is a former marine (yes ladies, eat your hearts out and be jealous) and he doesn't care much for army.

Mrs. Hullabaloo is already penciling down a shopping itinerary for the days surrounding the game.

The next two games: Oct. 10 at home against Marshall, Oct. 17 at home against Houston. I just don't have the energy to expend writing a syllable about those teams. October 10th is Homecoming though. Green v. Green. I am not feeling the love on that color combination.

Home or away, games against Houston are not high on my list of "fun." Years ago Mrs. Hullabaloo was tackily propositioned by a 1000 year old Houston booster. Honestly. I still have nightmares over the encounter. In 2007 Mr. and Mrs. Hullabaloo almost found themselves in a knockdown fist fight with some typically trashy Cooter fans while minding our own business picking up our tailgating order at Mother's. For real. Oh, and this idiot player tore his jersey off and climbed up their director's stand to belt out their fight song while our band was playing our alma mater to the team at the conclusion of the game.

Last year it must have been Cryps/Bloods vs. Latin Kings Knight at UH Homecoming. Or UH really is just ghetto.

They are just ghetto.The females all had their hair gelled into ringlets, carefully painted ^ for eyebrows, grillz in their mouth and shorts that could have passed for underwear. The men wore the latest in ghetto baggy pant fashion. We even spotted a guy wearing a spinner tire rim as bling on a chain around his neck. and then the team viciously attacked Joe Kemp on a cheap shot during a dead play. Classy the Cooters are not.

Oct. 24 at Southern Miss. Mr. Hullabaloo is so excited about going to Hattiesburg. We already have plans to take the Southern Crescent train. I can already picture us lazily sipping a cocktail as we gaze out onto South Louisiana and South Mississippi. Even though it will take twice as long as driving. Mr. Hullabaloo picked out a wonderful cookbook from Robert St. John recently. We are very much looking forward to a delightful evening at a Chef St. John establishment. Now if Hattiesburg had a cool boutique hotel we'd be set.

Oct. 31 at Baton Rouge. Halloween. How fitting. We'll be able to complement for real everybody's costumes (is that a derriere face mask or what happened to you?). Ha! Hope Mr. Frank will consider unveiling The Skull for this frightful occassion.

Nov. 7 at home against Texas-El Paso. The miners. I always think of that super hot Bachelor from the Meredith season who formerly played for the Miners. Matthew Hickl. Remember the almost last episode: the getting ready scene and all's Mr. Matthew is wearing is a towel? yummy. He played in NFL-Europe, pre-season with the Seahawks and even got a tryout with the Saints. Anyways. Mr. Hullabaloo is reading over my shoulder (plus Matthew married this ugly model 2 years ago), so time to stop drooling and get back to this football schedule.

The last two games of the season we go to Houston and to Orlando. Nov 14 is at Rice and November 21 is at Central Florida.

The Hotel Zsa Zsa is directly across the street from Rice Stadium. I can't wait!

The Central Florida trip I will need to give some thought to, having never been there. Patti Terranova told me this hilarious story about how she and Bridget Holt drove non-stop by themselves from New Orleans to UCF the Katrina season to watch Bubba and Scott. They are crazy those two.

OK Greenwave nation: 7 months til September 4th!

Men Like Fire

Football is my thing. Everybody knows Mr. and Mrs. Hullabaloo tailgating spot is where it's at. Come join the fun, grab a frosty beverage, make yourself at home.

My beloved football players came to the USC game last night and showed the folks seated behind the plate how to be a crowd. (credit to wavebaseball for the photo)

I do love those boys!

When spring rolls around Mrs. Hullabaloo cedes the merriment hosting to the baseball krewe in Section 110.

In Baseball, Section 110 sets the pace. Shooter fridays, "DIRTBALL," all of that. Well since Shooter graduated, we haven't quite come up with something catchy for Conrad Flynn. Years from now archeaologists will dig up zillions of these little shooter cups over the remains of Section 110 and just wonder about the habits of our civilization. Odd drinking ritual near what appears to be an athletic court...

Well to add to the festivities at baseball games, Turchin II is finally complete with the new parking lot over Rosen House. Hoo-ray. I think that the international and married students at the former Rosen probably watched the antics in Section 110 more than they observed the game. Anyways, we thank them for surrendering space to allow us to commence the merriment with proper tailgating.

We have a lovely couple who joins us in Section 110 who follow Notre Dame football in the fall (Do you cry when Rudy gets the sack? It gets me every time!) and Tulane baseball in the spring. Mr. and Ms. Notre Dame have no use for the 13th grade school in Baton Rouge just as much as we do. They belt out our amended version of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" just as loud as us ("for it's one! two! screw L-S...!")

Last spring the delightful Ms. Notre Dame, in the quintessential New Orleans fashion, picked up a gallon of Superior Grill margaritas, tossed it in a backpack with SG to go cups, straws and popped a squat with us on the neutral ground on Claiborne across from the Frostop. A merry time was had by all. And I do LOVE me some margaritas. Especially Superior Grill margaritas. Frosty perfectly blended wonderfulness. Mrs. Hullabaloo was in RARE form that night. And then the hangover set in. Mrs. Hullabaloo lolled and napped on the couch all the next day and coo'd at Mr. Hullabaloo until he fetched us some Popeyes.

So now that we have ourselves a real parking lot to put to good use, the Founding Fathers of Section 110 have gotten serious about this tailgating thing. The battle has begun between baseball tailgating and football tailgating. But the funny thing is: Men Will Be Men.

I keep this genius notepad as my "Honey Do" listmaker for Mr. Hullabaloo. It say "MY HUSBAND DOESN'T COOK, HE BARBECUES. MEN WILL COOK AS LONG AS THERE IS DANGER INVOLVED." It reminds me of when Mr. Hullabaloo got all fancy on me and prepared orange roughy with a pesto sauce. yum. green fish.

This week we received a hilarous email from a Section 110 Founding Father: he was going to be "Prepared" this Saturday and wanted to "Cover All the Bases", interogate us all and gather together VERY detailed and copious data on the upcoming tailgating preparations.

You see, in his haste and mad dash from the Northshore to Turchin last weekend, his brain was absolutely focused as men's brains are. As he sped along the causeway and past 2 Winn Dixies, 2 Rouses, a Robert's and a Dorignac's, his mind was on how he was going to unveil a beautiful shiny new grill and impress us with his barbecuing skill and prowress. Afterall, he had thoughtfully packed everything that mattered. To a man. His beautiful new grill. The Charcoal. and The Meat. What else would one need?

Napkins? nope. Utensils to cook or serve? nope. Plates? nope. Condiments? We have meat cooked over open flame! Why ruin the trip down caveman memory lane? He was turning hot dogs with his bare fingers!

Hilarious. So today FF will get his mulligan on tailgating at Turchin.

Peggy made deli meat po-boys to contribute. Priscilla made delish potato salad. yum. It's crawfish season: so Mr. and Mrs. Hullabaloo ventured out to Schaeffer's seafood in Bucktown for those tasty little suckers, the died and gone to heaven boiled mushrooms, corn and potatoes. Lisa picked up a lovely assortment of petit fours from Marguerites in Slidell. Mr. Peggy whipped up sone sinful White Russians. FF graciously shared some Craft Beer from his collection with Mr. Hullabaloo, while serving as master griller with brats, burgers and hot dogs.

It was a GLORIOUS day at the ball park. Mrs. Hullabaloo even got a "Cute Top!" greeting from the one and only Mrs. Bob Toledo. I am still pinching myself.

Here's some recipes from the day:

Priscilla's Potato Salad
whomp of Blue Plate mayonaise (very important)
generous smidge of must be Fresh parsley (Priscilla grows some in her backyard, also important)
handful chopped boiled eggs
handful green onion
handful chopped BELL PEPPER (secret ingredient)
squirt mustard

salt and pepper to taste
oh, and of course the potatoes. I myself prefer yukon gold.

Boil your potatoes whole, chop and mix with all the other ingredients, bring in a cute container and keep it at a table far away from me or I WILL finish the entire bowl. Delicious as a topping on pringles. Multi-tasks as an hors d'ouevre!

No Mistake Burger Patties
Choice of ground meat (Mr. and Mrs. Hullabaloo use turkey, sirloin or filet)
smidge Ground mustard powder
smidge Italian seasoning herbs
few dunks Worcesterchire sauce
dash salt and pepper

Mush ground meat and seasonings and sauce together into patties. Grill 3 minutes on each side.

Even Mrs. Hullabaloo can do it and Mrs. Hullabaloo is a disaster with the grill.

ROLL WAVE!